February 3rd 2020 @SierraVille Hot Springs
Last Friday, I had a true “ahah-moment”. I discovered the possibility of writing a journal and it was a liberating and trans-formative experience. I know it doesn’t sound like much of a big deal, it’s a basic idea. Bur it was for me and I want to share why because I believe it can help liberate and transform others, as well as increase love in the world!
Last week while waiting for my girlfriend I picked up a random book on our shelf. The book, a New York Times Best Seller, was actually a journal. The title “The book of awakening” and subtitle “ Having the life you want by being present to the life you have” sounded appealing.
( If you allow me a short sarcastic digression, I must say that I’m amused that almost every book I ever pick is a “best-seller”. It’s like pizzas, I think every pizza place I ever ate at was the best pizza of some kind. I had multiple best pizzas in the world, multiple best pizza of the year! There are so many categories you can be the best in whatever you do in some way. Isn’t it magical! I think my text is going to be voted by a very selective and objective committee (composed by myself, my girlfriend and I ) , the best text published so far by me in 2020! You should read it, it’s the best :) )
Back to my point, I picked up the book, opened a random page and realized it was a short text written under a certain day. The author was just writing a little piece of story and advice for each day of the year. I was a little disappointed and at the same time amazed. I mean, Wow! This is genius I thought to myself. You can actually write a book that is not a long story. You can break it down to several small pieces and still be a Best Seller with a terrific blurb by Oprah!
It was so trans-formative for me because it removed a block. I want to write; I like to write. However, I get discouraged most of the times because I feel that I don’t have enough material, that I have nothing to say, that it is a drop in the ocean etc… I feel like I need to be able to write a whole book or nothing. And I know in my head, with my understanding mind that big projects need to be broken down into small parts. I understand that in order to be good at writing I need practice. I get that in order to one day write a book I need to start with essays, short stories, social media posts. I need practice. I knew all that with my mind, but I hadn’t digested it. I hadn’t brought this concept to my heart in order to get an emotional understanding which would lead to a practical understanding and then action!
Opening that book and reading that small story for that day, removed the block that wasn’t letting me process that information. The book helped me process that understanding from my mind to my heart. Few days later , here I’m writing my first journal entry! I decided from now on that any day I feel like writing I will start by typing the day on the upper left corner of my page and just write. It’s OK to not write a book because even few lines will just be “the few lines of the day”. The beauty of it doesn’t stop here, after enough days I will have thousands of lines! No shame Mr. ego, no excuse Mr. procrastinator even a best-selling author is doing that!
So I got the courage to write and the validation to write little by little. Great. But, why do I write? Why do we need to write?
I have been thinking about that a lot and finding many reasons why not to write. As you may guess, all the reasons why not, are simply creative excuses. Why do I write? Because I like it. I don’t need more reasons. But liking it isn’t enough sometimes, likable things are subject to too many changes. The reason that gives me the courage to write is love. It sounds cliché! But hear me out, let me explain.
When we write we express parts of ourselves. We share some of our emotions, questions, feelings, sensations, understandings, discoveries, doubts, fears, success, learning, etc.. When we write we put pieces of ourselves out there. On the other end, when we read we connect to the author, we share for few moments his experience. As we go through our life we can become isolated sometimes, not remembering that we’re not the only ones living this human experience. We forget that all of us don’t really know nor understand what the heck we’re doing here. This feels extremely lonely at times, some sort of existential void. Yet, it’s really hard when we meet someone to connect deeply to each others humanness. We’re often too preoccupied or too busy at that moment to connect. We’re too scared, or too happy! The timing is rarely good. But when we take the time to write and read, we make the time and it becomes a good timing for human connection (considering we don’t let ourselves be distracted with the endless distractions available).
The connection removes the existential void for few precious moments. We’re no longer feel alone since we’ve met another human without his masks, without his guards, just a human. This is what it’s all about and it worth it. Sharing our human experience and allowing a connection that is beyond space and time. Writing creates bridges that go beyond our guards, bridges that go through our shells. This bond is one of the expressions of Love. In that sense I said earlier that Love makes me write.
I heard once a beautiful teaching from kabbalah (Hebrew mysticism) . In Hebrew, letters have numerical values and so do words . This allows the creation of some meaningful associations by making links between words that have the same numerical value. It’s a way to create meaning. The word for love in Hebrew (Ahava) has a numerical value of 13. The word for one (Ehad) also has a numerical value of 13. This brings the idea that one aspect of Love is to make one, to become one. When a bond is created between two separate entities, you allow connection and oneness, this is love. Therefore, I write for love.
Another way to say this comes from Alan Watts whom I want to quote here:
“Stop aspiring and start writing. If you’re writing, you’re a writer. Write like you’re clinging to the edge of a cliff, white knuckles, on your last breath, and you’ve got just one last thing to say, like you’re a bird flying over us and you can see everything, and please, for God’s sake, tell us something that will save us from ourselves. Take a deep breath and tell us your deepest, darkest secret, so we can wipe our brow and know that we’re not alone. Write like you have a message from the king. Or don’t. Who knows, maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who doesn't have to.” ~ Alan Watts.
I believe this to be true for all forms of sharing. As long as it is genuine. Whatever you have to share, please share it we will never have enough opportunities to connect and increase love in this world.
